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Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Sombong...


Dearest all, readers and viewers, friends and strangers of my blog, Assalamualaikum Warahmatullahi wabarokatuh...

I don't know why but I feel I just have to write about this issue/ topic; it's like, there comes a time when you suddenly got an idea to write about something, a specific subject - but never know why you got that urge to write about it. And yeah, I guess I got it alright. I wanna write about this, but clearly, I myself pun tak sure why I nak write about this. I feel that if I don't write about this, I tak senang duduk. And if I do, maybe this feeling of uncomfy and uneasy will go away... (I hope)...

So in this particular entry, I'm here to discuss about 'Sombong'. I wanna go stage by stage, so lets start things off with the definition of 'Sombong'...

"Sombongnya dia... orang tegur pun tannak jawab?"

"Eh, jgn kawan ler dengan dia tu. Sombong nak mampos!"

"Kenapa makin sombong sangat sekarang ni?"

Adakah perkataan 'Sombong' yang kita gunakan dalam ayat² kita seharian tu, betul? Are you sure u've used the word 'Sombong' dalam konteks yang sepatutnya? - Melalui tiga contoh ayat yang selalu digunakan diatas tu, the answer is - NO.

What is Sombong?
Clearly, kite semua tahu yang the word 'Sombong' boleh jugak digantikan dengan pelbagai nama² lain, like, 'kekwat' (majority hadek² semua tahu kekwat nih as sombong), 'belagak'? (like, arrogant - bongkak ie cakap besar and that kindda thingie) - org² tua dulu² always kaitkan 'sombong' as 'bodoh sombong' which means dah la bodoh, lagi nak belagak pandai ie sombong (which in my opinion is the actual meaning of the word 'Sombong' i.e Bongkak);

But sometimes, it is so funny, when someone tu tak kenal someone else, lets just say A dan B here in this example. A sees B yang duduk diam, tak senyum tak ape, just sitting there alone, terus A cakap B sombong; penah tak go through that experience? Adakah apa yang dilakukan B tu boleh didefinisikan sebagai sombong? Pada pendapat mek, I don't think so. Tapi rata² menyatakan sekiranya someone persis B ada dalam situasi tu dengan tingkah lakunya yang sebegitu, itu tandanya dia sombong - betul tak? Rata² la pemahaman orang cam tu.

Tak kenal maka tak cinta, correct? So if you tak kenal orang tu, dan kalau orang tu tak senyum dan tak bercakap ape², cam mana u ols boleh klasifikasikan org tu as sombong? Even if u dared urself to go and tegur that B fella, and if that B fella macam ndak tak ndak jer cakap ngan u, senyum pun macam lite², does that make B tu sombong? I don't think so. Maybe B diajar not to speak to strangers? Not to smile at strangers? How? Or simply, mek rase, B tak sombong, sebab, B tak buat apa² yang menjelaskan definisi sebenar seorang yang sombong. The correct word to decribe B is - penyengap or pendiam, or, tak pandai bergaul, maybe? Or sememangnya lumrah alam, kalau belum betul² kenal, tak kan nak go all out to be really friendly? You don't wanna be called Overfriendly now, would you? For some, "Biar lah overfriendly, jgn org gelar sombong" Masalahnya, kalau you just wanna be quiet, takkanlah itu buatkan u seorang yang sombong? Masalahnya sekarang, ramai tak paham bebetul apa itu Sombong...

What is the real definition of sombong i.e. arrogant? According to Merriam-Webster Online dictionary, the word Arrogant (Sombong) means:

Main Entry: ar·ro·gant
Pronunciation: -g&nt
Function: adjective
Etymology: Middle English, from Latin arrogant-, arrogans, present participle of arrogare
1 : exaggerating or disposed to exaggerate one's own worth or importance in an overbearing manner <an arrogant official>
2 : proceeding from or characterized by arrogance <arrogant manners>
synonym see PROUD
- ar·ro·gant·ly adverb

So basically sombong = arrogant = angkuh, tinggi diri, dan suatu perlakuan yang mempertingkatkan kehebatan nama sendiri bagi mencapai kepentingan diri dengan keadaan yang melebih²? Jadi dari sini, jika me nak bezakan dengan maksud 'Sombong' yang definisinya me dapat dari www.karyanet.com.my, basically tak der lah bezanye sangat:

Keputusan carian untuk Sombong
Jumlah carian: 1,
Masa carian: 0.11 saat.

Carian 1 hingga 1. Halaman 1

1. Sombong - menghargai diri sendiri dgn berlebih-lebihan; tinggi hati; bongkak: Jangan berkawan dgn orang yg ~.

So dengan ini boleh la kita simpulkan bahawa sombong/ arrogant means perlakuan, dimana, someone tu buat bebende yang telah dinyatakan dalam definisi² di atas tu.

NAMUN, oleh kerana pendapat umum mengenai SOMBONG itu berlainan dari apa yang telah didefinisikan oleh Kamus Dewan Bahasa dan Pustaka serta Merriam-Webster Dictionary, jadi disini, mek will teruskan entry 'Sombong' ini dengan menggunakan definisi masyarakat umum yang very pelbagai jenis maksudnya.

Generally, what are the reasosn behind org gelar that someone tu as sombong?
Macam² sebab actually, on mengapa people would wanna gelar someone tu sebagai sombong. Again, sombong here bukannye bermaksud seperti apa yang telah diterangkan diatas. I'm talking on actual facts, on what ppl claimed 'sombong' to be as just simply, berlagak or play quiet dan bukan dari segi konteks bercakap besar, angkuh dan takbur i.e riak. (yesss... riak is actually a better nama lain for sombong yang diterangkan oleh kamus² online tu tadi - tapi riak is not what most ppl maksudkan when they say about 'sombong'). Berikut adalah contoh² situasi yang berlakunya tuduhan seseorang itu as sombong (dalam contoh² berikut, lets just say si sombong itu bernama X) :

"X tu sombong lah. Orang senyum kat dia, haram tak senyum balik pun! Kalau tak kenal pun, senyum jer la"
Owh so, kalau si X tak senyum balik kat kita yang senyum kat dia pada mulanya tu, tu maknanya X tu sombong la? Namanya X tak kenal kita, takkan la kawan tu nak senang² senyum kat kita? I mean, ever heard of senyuman pada strangers can sometimes lead to padah? What happened to a stranger guy who senyums to a girl di bas stand? She ended up getting raped for returning that smile. So salahkah, I mean, Sombong kah si X kalau he/ she feels to reserve his/ her smile, just until one gets to know him/ her?

Pengalaman Lea: I've experienced this one too many time. For me, senyum tu memang lah sedekah tapi takkan lah sampai orang yang kita tak kenal hujung pangkal asal usul nya i.e strangers pon kita nak senyum also? And for that matter, I've been labeled as sombong. Seriously, where's the kalau tak kenal, maka tak cinta? You don't know me and vice versa - and I get to be labeled as 'sombong' just because I tak senyum to someone yang I tak kenal? Kang orang kata gatal mengada² la pulak? Or worse, "Gila ke Lea tu semua orangnye dia senyum... senget la tu" Dah kena labeled senget pulak? For me, kalau orang senyum kat I and I don't return the smile, TAK PER. JGN kalau org senyum kat kita, dan kita TARIK MUKA MASAM - itu baru cari padah jugak.

"X tu awat diam sangat? Ala - sombong lah tu. Maklumlah, anak org berada?"
Adakah diam tu salah? Dan semestinyakah jika anak orang berada tu sombong? Satu tanggapan yang I would have to say "BULLSHIT!" So what kalau si X tu memang pendiam orangnya? That doesn't make him/ her sombong? And what's with dilahirkan dalam keluarga berada? Kalau dia anak orang lot dan suka diam, itu sombong ke? Sombong dikalangan orang berada/ kaya is when si dia ie. X mula cakap bangalo dia ade berape bilik, barang² beli kat mana? Kerete ade berape bijik? Gaji berape ribu? And stuffs like that - and worse, kalau orang tak tanya dia pi citer - now THAT'S when I say orang kaya sombong menunjuk²

Pengalaman Lea: Sometimes kalau kita nih jenis air muka dah memang nampak persis sombong, anything yang berkaitan dengan kita pun jadi mangsa. Personally, kalau ramai yang kenal Lea outside this blog, ramai mengaku muka Lea sombong - tapi that is before they get to know me. And before kenal mek, diaorang would associatekan me being anak bigshot, sebab tu sombong i.e kekwat. Well, who can stop these ppl dari buat tanggapan sebegitu, kan? But sometimes it is so sedeh when ppl say you yang diam dan berair muka sedemikian, hanya kerana u anak orang berada? Masalahnya diaorang kenal ISI HATI BUDI ke, atau diaorang kenal PANGKAT yang menyebabkan diaorang classifykan me as Sombong?

"Aku tak paham lah. X dulu baik jer, sekarang very sombong. Kenape ek?"
Kalau dulu baik, sekarang tidak - itu namanya SOMBONG ke? Lain kot. What I understand is, kalau dulu X baik, sekarang X tak baik - tu namanya MANUSIA BERUBAH. Dan KALAU X berubah dari seorang yang lemah lembut dan rendah diri kepada seorang yang hati macam sial dan takbur dan angkuh, serves X right ppl call him/ her as DAH SOMBONG. Tapi kalau X yang dari baik berubah jadi someone else, less baik, tapi tidak angkuh bongkak cakap takbur bagai, itu bukan namanya SOMBONG - tu namanya perubahan pada diri X kepada someone yang less baik. It could be jahat for all u know tapi pointnya sini, jgn sesekali tuduh orang yang berubah tu, sikit² as sombong, sikit² sombong. Kenape, kalau orang berubah dari baik kepada something else, seharusnya dari baik ke sombong ke ke? Kalau X berubah dari baik kepada seorang pencuri, dia digelar jahat ke, atau sombong? Penggunaan perkataan sombong, AGAIN sudah salah tema.

Pengalaman Lea: I have reasons sometimes why I berubah from this perangai to another perangai, but SOMBONG has never been an option to the reasons. Period.

"Kalau nak tgk X dengan Y, X sombong sikit. Y peramah jer, semua orang dia tegur..."
This is funny. Jadi kalau X tegur semua orang termasuk orang gila tepi jalan, does that make him not sombong anymore? Being peramah is one thing, tapi kalau overdose peramah pun, boleh mengundang padah, correct? Just becoz X reserves his/ her friendliness, that doesn't mean dia sombong? The word is picky - and as a human being, I have to say, one has the every right nak be picky. Tapi sayangnya, once orang being picky, ade kaitnya dengan sombong to those yang tak dipicknya. Tul tak?

Pengalaman Lea: Before I join the airline, I was VERY malu dan sangat segan to talk to strangers. I am not naturally born friendly to everyone dalam dunia ni. But luckily, selepas joined the airline, communications was no longer a problem for me. I get to talk to everyone dalam flight. Pun begitu, being too friendly telah membawa mek di gelar kaki ampu/ bodek kuat. Dan when I changed from being too friendly, to just friendly, they called me "Dah mula sombong la tu". Sometimes, I just don't understand SOMBONG...

"Tu bukan X ke? Sombong lah dia tu, duduk sorang² je?"
Duduk sorang², nak some privacy, sombong ke? I don't think so. Sometimes manusia nih they prefer to lay low and just be alone. So that doesn't mean diaorang sombong, kan? For as long as we live, we can never understand how another person feels, no matter how hard we try to feel it, no matter how often kita sebut "I understand how u feel" - the truth is, we don't. Sebab if we do, kenapa harus dipersoalkan orang tu sombong/ kekwat ke tidak, kalau dia prefer to be left alone, or memang hobbynya to sit alone and think of the things he/she wants to? Kan? I mean, pernah tak we tanya diri sendiri, kenape, why, si X nak sit alone and just menyendiri? Pernah we question why Amelina went menyepi? Nope - spekulasi saja yang membanjiri minda kita and one of the spekulasi - Dia tu sombong la... tu la sebabnya dia nak duduk sorang² jer, kawan tannak ape tannak. Tul tak? Pernah tak kita pikir ape masalah X? All we think about is us us us...

Pengalaman Lea: There were times when I was a lil' bit tensed, balik dari flight - lepas buat show, and etc. And sometimes there were things I needed think about on my own, problems ke ape ke, kan? And because of that, sometimes I just wanna be left alone - DND kindda thingie. Tapi because of that privacy I asked for, ppl labeled me as sombong. It was hard to explain to ppl at that time yang kadang², kita just needed to be alone to think apa yang terbaik, whats the solution to certain problems, kan? Sebab tu we wanna be alone - tapi takk, kite dicopkan sebagai sombong sebab prefer to menyendiri. Kadang² tu bertambah tensi jadi nya...

Nak conclude this entry pun me tak sure how, but what I do know is this - this is just another 'from the bottom of my broken heart' entry; I write, and you read...






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Posted at 7:44:51 pm by Nurlea Laurielle Lai Lee Abdullah

Scandinavia
October 12, 2005   10:09 PM PDT
 
Curlast uols...skit lagi kalau asah bakat tu leh jadi journalist kat The STAR...Imahlenggok ingat dia je STAR..dia tak tau LL pun STAR...*matila I....Satu kupasan general dan luahan rasa peribadi yg menarik... As for me, I paling tak suker kes sombong menyombong persis menilai orang tanpa usul periksa... kenal pun tidak, suka2 nak kata orang tu sombong lah hape la...
Nurlea Laurielle
October 12, 2005   11:06 PM PDT
 
thanks for the compliments scan... it was nothing la. just another luahan rasa hati as topic kupasan entry jer...
azleen hamzah
October 12, 2005   11:32 PM PDT
 
tersentuh baca entry lea kali ni. macam u r now going tru some roughtimes? entry perbncangan sebegini leen rase bagus sangat lea sertakan dengan pengalaman serta penapat dia. leen like this entry dan two thumbs up for u. kepp it up.
Nurlea Laurielle
October 13, 2005   12:32 AM PDT
 
Leen, thanks! Mrasalah mek ok jer u ols. its just mek need to write about this secara tetibers jers u ols. Tak der lah tgh goin' through rough time. saje je nak buat kupasan mengenai ini. thanks for the comment!
Lee Novotny
October 13, 2005   02:40 AM PDT
 
Tu ler Lea..kalau kat sini, where I used to work before, kalau ada pekerja baru masuk, mulalah orang dok ngata orang tuh sombonglaaa, penyendiri laa bagai..tapi yg betulnya diorang kat situ yg tak bagi chance kat orang baru utk kenalkan diri..ye lah, baru masuk kan, mestilah gugup dan tak serasi lagi! :) Lumrah alam..like u said, tak kenal maka tak cinta!



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