*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*

Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Mushrooms...


Well - mushrooms... ape kes?

Kesnye, mek dah updated my fotopages with gegambar cendawanz. No no u perverts, not THAT mushrooms! HISH! I meant the REAL mushroom, cendawan, yang tumbuh kat laman itiew? Heheheh - mraslah click kat gambar mushroom kat the end of this entry to nengok more mushroom pics... but first (ahaaaa... there's always the BUT! Hehehehe)

This reminds me of a story, of a guy who is so... so... mengada-ngadaly bangga sangat with his think, big, hard rod in his pants (yes, this is goin' to be a XXX-rated story. Kids, please have your parents with you at all times while reading this entry - mati la mek!) Yeap, dia lah bagaikan Hang Tuah yang mega dasyat di kampungnya itiew, only in this case, it's somewhere, I don't know, oversea? Sebab I doubt this story was from somewhere around Malaysia? LOL! So anyways, this hard-on 24 hunk by the name of Mario, was drinking his way with his pal kat a local bar.

Friend: Say, you're sure damn lucky to have that rod of yours hard 24-7. You could screw any gals u want in the village - better still, you could have them ALL! Muuwaahahahaha! Cheers to that mate! (sambil togak gelas beernye itiew... eww!)

Mario: Yeah, hell yeah - I could *beeep* any *beeep*ing girl I want in town. But I don't want to...

Friend: So, watcha gonna do with that hard on? (sambil matanya melirik2 nengok the big bulge kat seluar Mario itiew sambil air liurnya meleleh2 keluar dari mulut)

Mario: No ordinary gal is gonna have this hard rock in her wet *beep*, that's for sure...

Friend: Mario! What are you saying? U wanna *beep* a drag queen with that? (dalam otak kawan dia nih, dah mula terpikir "Kalau Mario dinch tasty dengan gals, mrasalah mek ade PELUANG nak ngap ciknek dia yang nala itiew! Hehehe")

Mario: No u silly dweeb!! I'm only aiming for one gal, and she's not like any other gals - and that gal lives beyond the palace walls...

Friend: Thhhheeeee princceesss??? (Again, dalam otak kawannya itiew "Dammit! Ewww I hate that b**ch! Siap lah dia mek akan pecah lobang yang dia tu sebenarnye cik pon, dan bukannye puks betul - OPPSSS!!!!")

Before he could pecahkan lobang the Princess to Mario, Mario dah lesap katanya... mana Mario pergi? Lets find out...

Mario dah lama aimed the princess; dalam mata Mario, only the Princess yang boleh selesaikan masalah ketegang ciknek nye itiew. Dah lama he perhatikan gerak geri princess itiew. Banyak dia dah plan. Cuma tunggu kesesuaian masa saja. Kisahnye, the princess selalu keluar bermain bola emasnya di garden just behind the palace; selalunye she would play from 7am to 7.30am. Every morning, I say every morning, dia akan bermain dengan bola emasnya itiew... and Mario, yang seperti biasa sudah sedia mengintip princess itiew by 6.59am, pun berkata pada dirinya...

"Owh my dear Princess, how I wish it is my d**k that yang you main mainkan, instead of that pathetic stupid gold plated ball of yours tu! Fear not my princess, tomorrow, you will have something worth playing with... I promise you my love..." Hehehehehe...

And so the malam menjelma, dan Mario climbed on the palace walls, dan starts digging a hole dan kambuskan dirinya, EXCEPT for his ciknek! He waited patiently, sanggup menguburkan dirinya hidup2, semata2 kerana Princessnya itiew. And then, the next morning, as usual, the princess, yang dengan cerianya in her Versace dress (Versace katanye - mati la mek!), came down the steps of the palace, heading towards her garden when she discovered something....

"Ooooooooooo a mushroooommmmmmm" (read: Imagine Didi, Dextor's sister saying that! Yeah, pathetic kan? Very bimbo... hehehe)

"I loooovvveeeeeeee musshhhrrooommsssss...." sambil mengusap2 mushroom itiew...

"I loooovvveeeeeeee mmuushh... eh? Wait - how come this mushroom ade rumput2 persis rambut afro berwarna hitam? Weird type of grass - curly, black.... owh must be one of those rare species of musssshhhhhhrrrroooommmm kot...." she said, sambil continue mengusap2 mushroom 'hidup' itiew....

"Ahhhhhhh mushrooomm sudah mengembangggg.... Yeh! Owwhh yeh! Kembanglah wahai mushroom, feel the morning sun!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!" Yeap, she's getting excited alright - more like orgasm if u ask me. LOL...

As she strokes the mushroom, her throat ala ala dahaga lah pulak... dan pada masa yang sama, she saw cecair coming out dari mushroom itiew... pucuk dicita ulam berair mendatang! LOL!

"Ahhhhhhhh veeeryyy nicceeee! Mushroom have watterrrrrr. Meeee thirsty! Lets minum dulu!" and so, yes, well figured, she terus minum cecair itiew... dan after the first few licks....

"Errrrrrmmmmm sallttyyy waterrr.... sticky waatterrrr..... I LIKE!!!!"

Nah! Terus she continued sucking and sucking all the cecair yang ade. Mario on the other hand dah menggeletar dalam tanah tu, mata dah juling, dan ready to .. erm... cumm? Hehehe... he wanted to warn the princess that it has been a while since he last ejaculated. Tapi apakan daya... he can't pecah lobang...

"Oooooooooo mushroooommmmm giving morreee and mooreee sticky salty watterrr! Me likeeeeeeee"

"Oooooooo mushrooommmmm so nice!!!!"

And oooo mushroom memancut2kan air salty sticky ke muka princess itiew - not a single drop she let it to waste, semuanya ditelan jilatnya. EEEWW!!! After licking it all, her fingers and what not, suddenly, she turns back to the mushroom... and to her surprise, (or was it shock? Hmm)...

"Awwwwwwww.... cendawannnn layu sudahhhhh!!!!!...... Me want more...!!!" annd yes, she started to cry. But after a while, she heard voices, like, an angel or something....

"Dear, my dear princess. Kalau u nak more, come back here tomorrow morning. You'll be happy to find more mushroom drinks... I promise you... " yeap, THAT'S MARIO, confirmed! Feeling la ciktan tu! Nak kasik lagi katanya! LOL!... And so the princess quickly wiped off her tears dan masuk balik ke palace. Just before she went in, she screamed...

"Me want more and more mushroom water! Me like!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Lepas tu, Mario terus keluar dari lubang tu dan lari balik ke kampung, yes, with a no-longer-a-hard-on-d**k! As he was running back to the village, dia terpikir about the sad princess, and about the promise he made to the princess, so that she would be happy. "Cam mana ek? Penat la aku nak kasik lagi air kat dia. Hmm" - dok lari2 tu, he dapat an idea. Hehehehe... he went back to the bar, told 20 guys, ape dah terjadi. Semuanya nak tahu ape citernye? Even Mario's friend yang tadi tu pun semangat nak dgr citernye tu... and so, Mario pun duduk sambil minum beer, dan story telling la kat kawan2nya itiew. By night falls, all his 20 friends semuanya nak menabur bakti pada Princess itiew, and 'make her happy and no longer thirsty' katanya! LOL! And then they asked Mario to lead them...

"Errrr... that's ok boys... You go on ahead - I'll skip on this one, for now. Tired sial! Esok lusa boleh lagik... hahahaha" katanya Mario, refusing... hehehe...

And so these 20 guys, plus Mario's good friend, so all of them, 21 of them to be exact, did the same thing, just like Mario did. They climbed on the palace walls, masuk ke garden tu, dan start tanam diri diaorang masing2, leaving their cikneks uncovered.

Lepas tu, nak jadi ceritanya, the next day, the princess came out pagi tu, and saw her garden in total shock... (ahhh yes, confirmed this time, in total shock...)

"Oooooooooooooooooooooooooo sooo manyyy mushroommsss!!!"

"Sooooooooo many different shapes and sizes..... ewwwwwwwwwwwww!"

"Me tak suke, me tak suke!!!!!!!!!!! Mencemarkan my garden....! EEEWWW!!!!"

"Guards!!! Buang SEMUA mushrooms2 tu!!! Tebang, potong, cantas - whatever u wanna call it! ME DON'T LIKE!!!!!!! Me want only one mushroom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Nahhhh - alkaedahnye, habis semua 'mushroom2' itiew dipotong tebang cantas habis! THAT'S IT! Maka terciptalah cik pons yang ber puks! See, DULU2 tak payah habis RM90K yang buat puks semua - dulu2, free2 jer boleh buang cikneks dan free2 jer dapat jadik woman! LOL!!!! Mati lah mek! (mati la mek ngan pondan potong puks bawak Jazz Merah tu! Oppsss!)

Gile ke idak? HAHAH - citer nih sapa tah bagi tau kat mek dulu dulu. Knowing me, ade jer lah mek propah ubah edit segala bagai. Hope you guys enjoyed it. Meanwhile, lets, click lah pic mushroom kat bawah nih, to view more REAL cendawan/ mushrooms in my fotopages. Dinch perlu kebenaran parents yer! LOL!!!!

Click on the image to proceed to my fotopages





Like my page? Vote for me HERE!!! And HERE too!!! Thanks u ols!!!





Posted at 9:08:36 pm by Nurlea Laurielle Lai Lee Abdullah

elly
August 31, 2005   09:35 PM PDT
 
hahahaha best gile citer nih! made me laugh out out loud HAHHAHA!

alternatively... i thot the ending would be something like princess tu ajak fellow bloggers dia mrasa her new garden... tea party in the garden ghituuu!

alas... heheh!
Lee Novotny
August 31, 2005   10:01 PM PDT
 
LOL Lea, I pernah dgr cerits nih masa buat A-Level dulu (from my friend jugak..orghe kelate)..tapi versi u lagi hillarious..versi fefonens lah katakan!!! :)
Seronoklah kalau banyak mushroom cenggitu utk diusap jilat tiap tiap hari..eh gersang pulak mak!
Adam
September 2, 2005   12:05 PM PDT
 
Hahahaha....best giler citer ni. Terus hilang tension kat office ni. Me want more...!!! Want more...!!!
nohara
January 1, 2006   03:00 PM PST
 
ingat kan cendawan konek tadi Ooooooooopsssssss molot mak yaamatzlah the lucah yaampun takuts mak



Leave a Comment:

Name


Homepage (optional)


Comments




Previous Entry Home Next Entry