From the last episode... Episode 15: First half of 2004 - Part 2 - (i) A road to another failure; Miss World Diva Pageant 2004 - Bahagian 1!!!

Sabar lah Lea, hang getek sangat nak bertanding dengan transsexuals yang wayyyy out of you league nih, so, terima jer lah! - Thats what I said to myself lah kan... (to be continued in Episode 16: First half of 2004 - Part 2 - (i) A road to another failure; Miss World Diva Pageant 2004 - Bahagian 2!!! - NANTIKAN (Tak lama lah!!! Esok up lah kot Bahagian 2 tu! LOL!)

Episode 16: 1st half of 2004 Part 2(i) - A road to another failure, Miss World 2004 - Bahagian 2 (HAIYOH! MEK RASE BAHAGIA 2 NIH PANJANG SANGAT SUNDELL!! MATI LA AKU!)

Bilik changing room utk para contestants makin penuh - bukan sekadar penuh dengan para peserta with their respective make up artists, penuh jugak dengan 'Kak Nam's (bz badans), propah sana propah sini, gossip sana sinik, haiyoh! MEK CEMAS! Setiap kali mek cemas, setiap kali itu lah mek akan pastikan Kak Veen touch upkan muka mek! VW was already outside, dengan ade lah sorang dua tiga kengkawanz kami yang hadir.

Event was about to start - my kaki was killing me!!! Haidee buatkan those heels 4 1/2" rasenye (or was it 4"... hmmm) Apa apa pon, mek dah mola rase sakit kaki. Benci la when I have those type of feelings. Macam, ade jer something mek rase tak kena. Namun begitu, heads up and think positive someone pesan kat mek - so mek pulak salah tekel nasihat tu, BERTAMBAH OVER CONFIDENT nak menang! My bad, my mistake.

Keliling mek usya, mek tgk - Hurm... lawa2 la semuanya. Namun, tak der lah yang va va voom famous gedebas gedebus yang masuk bertanding. Semuanya lawa2 pon, namun, mek dinch pernah tgk before2 this. Ade lah sorang dua yang mek kenal sebabkan shows ke or pernah competed dalam contests2 lain, pon begitu, disebabkan mek tak nampak any drags yang famous2 yang va va vooom yaamatz melerts, mek set up LAGI high hopes nak menang dan mek overdose yakin mek mampu dos top 10 dan top 5 pada malam tu. (Yer memang diakui, mek memang dah makin confidensi sebab nama nama seperti Sherryn, Shasha Penang, Pasha - diaorang tak der. So since I won 1st runner-up Miss Universe Diva 2003 dulu tu, mek pasti mek ade tempat top 5) Entah la kenape weird sangat expektasion mek malam tu. Adakah sebab mek rase tak der saingan? Ade ke mek over dos confident? Tah lah - it was just, pelik la malam Miss World tu.

Seawal2 contest nak bermula tu, dah nampak dah organizer sebok kehulu kehilir, nak memastikan pertandingan berjalan lancar. The event, hosted by Azwan Ali (over yaamatz!!!!!!) dan judgesnye ade dari Indonesia, ade Datin 2 orang, ade Fendi X-Factor (haiyoh mek cair sundel tgk dia senyum kat mek! Feeeling lagi tu! But it was true lah!) and on top of everything, the organizer (Mak Ita tu lah) sebok ajer kesana kemari, more particularly selalu nampak bersama2 dimeja2 juri... HMMMMMM... sesuatuh sangat, kans?

So anyways, event started off with the national costume. Owh, did I tell you mek contestant number 2, after Turkey. Malam tu national costume mek tgk semuanye meriah2, namun, yang berkonsepkan all whiterinas, hanye me, Miss Dominican and also Miss Greece (Emma Hatta itiew) dan Miss Mexico (sapa tah - tapi lawo!!! Macam Zakiah Anas pong ade). So dari situ mek bajet2 leh lah dapat perhatian judges. After Turkey buat opening dengan dia punye intro, si Azwan tu announce mek, Miss Dominican Republic utk tampil kedepan dan kasik into line...

Azwan: Next, we take a look, at our second contestant, Miss World 2004!!!!

Nyeh! Haprak la dia tu (sorry la Azwan, kalu kalu ko baca blog nih, or kalu ade penyampai nak sampaikan kat u ols, mek dinch kisah, sebab memang betul pon! Tah pa per la ko sebut) Dia bukannye welcomekan mek as Miss Dom. Rep. Instead, dia welcomed Miss World 2004, betul tak mek cakap? Text dia tu mek dinch propah sebab ade bukti, VCD MEK! LOL!!!!

Me: (Mek started cakap tah hape2 tah bahasa Spanish? Latin? Tah pa per mek dapat tah - memang CONFIRM mek bedal jer sebab mek amik dari lirik Michico Latino! LOL!!!!! - Then mek sambung dengan English version piula) Good evening Ladies and gentlemen. My name is Lea Laurielle De La Vega (kononnye since I represented Dominican Republic, mek selit2 kan la sediks nama the reigning Miss Universe 2003 yang bebetul dari Dominican Republic itiew, Amelia Vega itiew - kot2 lah dapat restiew.. hehehe), and tonight I'm proud to represent my beautiful country, and the gateway to South America, Dominican Republic! (NYEH! MEK LAGIK KUAT KELENTONG! Dom. Rep. tu gateway to South America ke? Bukan ke Venezuela? LOL! Tapi ayat yang sama mek guna waktu mek represent Mexico, Colombia dan mek turunkan pada anak ayam mek Sharlene waktu dia menang Miss Universe 2004, and dia wakil Venezuela. Haiyoh! Kexiatuns lah!)

So lepas intro round - semua all 25 contestants dah habis buat introduction negara masing, tibalah results utk Best National Costume 1st, 2nd and 3rd placing. Tapi sebelum they announced ketiga2 pemenang tu, mek dah bukak tirai pemenang subsidiary titles, by winning Best Presentation on Stage during The National Costume round! Dah, satu dah mek menang! Dan pembukaan pulak tu! Haiyoh! Mek lagik kuat feeling yang that night would be MY NIGHT! Lepas tu they announced 2nd Runner up, Miss Thailand, 1st Runner up Miss Egypt and winner for Best National Costume, Miss Kenya (very the Kak Noraniza Idris stylo dia - bak kata Azwan, NANGIS KAK ANI TGK!!!)

Lepas tu, terus ke Evening wear round. Tapi waktu dok salin2 1/2 jam tu, ade la shows lah, cabutan bertuah lah, itu ini. Tapi believe me, 1/2 jam tu rase cam tak cukup jer. Kak Vee tukar kaler lipsepetik lah, betulkan sanggul mek la, then sebok pakaikan dresslah (yer, time nih la Kak Vee, Abang Haidee dan VW sebok pakaikan corset mek - TIGA ORANG PAKAIKAN CORSET! Haiyoh! Bentat kah mek!?!?!?!) Pastu pakai heels semua dah - then tibalah time naik pentas. SENTAP!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why? I tot tak ramai pilih pakai merah/ pink! HA! Amik ko Lea! First group naik stage, 5 orang contestants, 3 orang pakai MERAH! Dah la tu, the first 3 contestants pulak tu, Turkey, Dom. Rep. dan Canada - ketiga2, side by side, semua pakai RED! Haiyoh!!!!! PERLU KE!?!?!? Namun mek tetap gagahi jua - feeling ok pakai dress tu. Tapi ade suara2 sumbang (dan orang tu pong rajin chat kat TB si CD dan Ginger... opppss! Siape ek?) Dia sound "APE LOREAL NIH!? EVENING DRESS DIA NIH TAK KENA KONSEP LAH! NIH MISS LAH BUKAN SUPERMODEL!!!" Nahhh! Bekas pemenang Miss Universe, Miss World dan Supermodel pondan bertetek dah sound gittu. Mek terus SEDIKITS kiciwa! Mek ingatkan dengan tampil dengan gaya LAIN sikit, mek akan diiktiraf? Rupernye, akak kite tu, sudah KRITIK mek gittu. Mek terus awan yang terpulai!

Lepas dah selesai round evening dress, ade show lagik (HAIYOH! MOTIF SHOW BANYAK GILE!?!?!) - and then naik balik pentas, diaorang nak kasik another 5 subsidiary titles.

• Best Make Up - Miss Israel
• Best Smile - Miss Greece
• Miss Hot Favourite - Miss Malaysia
• Best Evening dress - Miss Dominican Republic
• Best Hairdo - Miss Venezuela

Check it out! Out of 5 sub awards tu, 3 awards, dapat kat transgenders yang bertanding, me, Dom. Rep; Emm, Greece and Ayang; Venezuela. Mesti berapi sesetengah pehak! Memang mek tahu ade yang berapi sebab AGAIN ade suara2 sumbang yang cakap, "HAIYOH! PERLU KE ketiga2 gayboy tu dapat subsidiary titles?????" Ala nyeh - nak buat cam no, REZEKI? Ehehehehe. Yang mek tau, MEK DAH CEKUP 2 sub awards! Mek pasti kejayaan dalam tangan mek dah! LOL!

And then, it was time to announce top 10 - na ah! Dinch top 10! It was top 12!!!!! Haiyoh! Mek feeling macam AF pulak (not at that time lah, I mean now, as am writing this! LOL!) So Azwan said the names were in no merit order;

• Miss Canada
• Miss Israel
• Miss Venezuela
• Miss Philipines
• Miss Greece
• Miss Kenya
• Miss USA
• Miss Indonesia
• Miss Mexico
• Miss Thailand
• Miss Malaysia
• Miss Dominican Republic

Check this out pulak peeps:
1st-ly - Ketiga2 gayboys transgenders yang masuk bertanding malam itiew - tiga2 dapat masuk top 12! (That's a good sign!)
2nd-ly - MOTIF mek last they announced masuk top 12? Haiyoh - banyak2 contest, selalu mek diaorang announce last (Mentaliti mek time tu - haiyoh! Mesti mek amongst top scorer dah malam itiew, kire like, saving the best for last la gittiew. Choys! Mati lah aku! And then perasaan mek, time2 diaorag announced semifinalist number 8 ke , 9 ke, like, HAIYOH!!!! MANA NAMA MEK NIH!? Tak dapat ke!?!?!? BUT I'VE WON 2 SUBAWARDS ALREADY!!!!!! But aha, itu la mek salah! Tak semestinya kalau dapat bolot SEMUA sub awards, mek CONFIRMASI masuk top 12 - tgk la Egypt? Dia kan dpt 1st Runner-up Best National Costume. And did that one helped her masuk semifinals? Nope... So itu memang mek akui persepsi mek memang salah confirm tak betul!!!!!)

So anyways, tiba lah time IQ session. Mek salute satu jer dengan Miss World tahun tu. Mak Ita dan her organizing team dah siap dah, 25 soalan utk 25 negara (each country, 1 q) and once sampai ke session IQ nih, all Azwan perlu buat was, tgk dalam senarai list itiew, country mana yang masuk top 12 tu, dah - soalan tersedia. Bagus la cam tu. And trust me, soalan2 dia, mek ingatkan soalan2 general "What is Love" atau "What is Beauty" kindda thingie - BUZZZ!! WRONG! Soalan2 yang disediakan, wallaiiauu!!!! Susah jugak - and ia berkaitan dengan negara masing2! MUJUR si VW dah suruh mek baca semua pasal Dominican Republic tu. Masalahnye sekarang, mampu ke mek ingat balik apa yang mek dah baca? Hentam aje la labu.

Sebelum turn mek, macam2 mek dgr jawapan2 dari other contestants. Ade yang gave out brilliant answers (namun si Azwan dah hanjengkan balik jawapan contestant itiew - CONTOH - Emma Hatta, Greece. Her answer was brilliant, full with poise and confident, and all Azwan needed to do was, kasik one simple one last remark lepas Emma answered her Q, and terus, harapan Emma nak ke top 5 - HANCUS! Sebab why? Emma terkedu dinch boleh jawab when Azwan asked, SIAPEKAH MENTERI SUKAN NEGARA ANDA? Hanjeng tak! Kesian pulak si Emma tu aku tgk) - TAK KURANG JUGAK contestants2 yang kasik jawapan2 hazabz (tak perlu Azwan carutzkan). Dan as for me, mek dah geared up to give the best dan be prepared kalau Azwan plans to hanjengkan mek! (note Azwan kenai la jugak mek - we've talked once or twice kat Bleu Bar sebelum tu so dia memang kenai mek atas stage malam tu - siap senyum sinis nih. CHIS!) SO then, tiba la masa mek nak jawab soalan - HAIYOH!!!! APA LAA SOALANNYE?

Azwan: Shall you welcome yourself to the guests...
Me: Good evening Malaysia and erm, welcome down to Miss World 2004. My name is Lea Laurielle De La.... Vega (sebelum mek said Vega tu, mek ter PAUSED sekejap - HAMPIR2 mek nak sebut Lea Laurielle De La Fuentes sebab Waktu mek wakil Colombia ngan Mexico dulu mek guna nama tu... phewww! Mujur lagi!)
Azwan: Is this your first time to Malaysia?
Me: Yes it is (Oh yeah, please lah! Minus the 24 years mek dah hidup di Malaysia tu yer, Thank You Very Much! PROPAH!!! LOL!)
Azwan: Do you like Malaysia? (Haiyoh! MOTIF!!!!!)
Me: Yeah, I'm enjoying my stay- enjoying every bit of the moment.
Azwan: Are you ready for your question? Would you like it to be in Bahasa or English?
Me: Erm... I would prefer it to be in English
Azwan: Wooo English... TEPUK!!!!! First contestant nak soalan in English. Mana soalannya nih? TAPI SOALANNYE TAK DER DALAM BAHASA INGGERIS????

Waktu tu crowd dah jerits2 sorak dan suruh Azwan translate and what not dan mek tgk gaya dia nak caras muka aku - so baik2 mek caras dia dulu...

Me: Owh nevermind. You can just ask me in Malay and I'll answer in English....

Crowd terus sorak - mek makin confident! MATI LA AKU! Sambil tertawa kecil, Azwan sambung...

Azwan: Bukan senang nih soalan nih nak translate ni... ape soalannya nih. Haaa, aktiviti pengganas, ha, this extreme activities, ha,... bukan saja berlaku di negara anda bahkan it happens all around the world. Bagaimanakah, kerajaan anda, mengatasi masalah tersebut...
Me: Right.. erm. I believe that this type of problem, can occur in any part of the world, because, it's part of the human nature, it's part of the human being. Whatever the goverment may do, they may suggest to do this and that, but it's up to them, I mean, to the person. I mean, you can't stop people from being a terrorist becoz they feel they wanna be a terrorist; you can't stop people from raping because they wanna be a raper; the thing is, one has to actually realize from inside, to actually realize that, erm, all these acts, all these terrorists acts can be stopped from within. So there's nothing a government can do, unless one human, realize this himself. Thank you ladies and gentlemen...

YARABI!!! APA LA AKU MEREPEK TU!?!?! MEK CUAK MEK PANIK DAN YER! MEK MENGGELABAH TETIBE! Segala confidensi levels mek dah merudum jatuh ke lantai dah time tu! Walaupun diiringi sorakkan (I wonder audience malam tu paham dak apa aku merepekkan malam itiew - tahlah), namun mek tetap rase "OWH GOD! I'VE SCREWED THIS ONE UP - AGAIN! DANG!"

Habis selesai top 12 IQ round - another 5 subsidiary titles diaorang kasik malam tu. And surprise surprise, Emma Hatta dan mek cekup semua habis...

• Miss Elegant - Miss Greece
• Miss Frienship - Miss Greece
• Miss Personality - Miss Dominican Republic
• Miss Intelligent - Miss Dominican Republic
• Miss Charming - Miss Dominican Republic

I remembered I gave Emma that smile and winked at her, "You'll be in top 5 Emma!" gittu la kirenye. Tapi, ADO!? NAN ADO! Dari situ mek dah bau2 sesuatuh - haiyoh!!!!! Mek takut lah pulak! Sebab after semua tu dah habis, when Azwan announced top 5, Emma wasn't in there. Instead, ade contestants yang pada mata mek, LANGSUNG TAK LAYAK to be in top 5, tetiber got into the list. Macam, SESUATUH sngt! Dah la nan ado sub awards (sebab the rest top 5 tu, semua dah ade subsidiary titles - so, leh la excused. Tapi yang sorang nih, HAIYOH!!!!!!!!!)



The evening's top 5 were:

• Miss Thailand (memangggg sangat2 layak! Mek tgk dia la paling meletop malam tu!)
• Miss USA (huh??? MOTIF!?!??!)
• Miss Dominican Republic (Ehem ehem! Owh please, mek dah suspect expect dapat top 5! HAIYOH KEJI LAH STATEMENT BONGKAK! hehehe)
• Miss Kenya (nih sorang lagi - sesuatuh sangat! Crowds' fav actually! Dan mek pon suke dia punye IQ - melerts!)
• Miss Malaysia (advantage sebab sokongan dan yeah, she memang lawo pon)

Kesian I was to Emma (who cried a bit back stage) but that's ok girl - better luck next time! Ayang was happy I made it into top 5. At least, ade gak wakil sorang transgender masuk ke top 5! So then, that's it! TOP 5 IQ session. Ini sesuatuh yang sampai ke sekarang mek tak puas hati! Each finalists akan dapat the same q. And once the first finalist gi jawab q, the remaining 4 akan pakai headset. (ala ala cam tannak kasik dengar la gittu) TAPI SESUATUH SANGAT! Si Miss USA tu, bila Azwan tanye "Eh Sabariah, ko dgr tak apa aku cakap nih?" Boleh tak si USA tu gi GELENG KEPALA!!!! APA TANDANYE TU!!?!? Dia boleh dengar lah!!! Why am I pissed!? Pissed lah sebabnye, mek was called into top 5, as finalist number 3. ALIH2 I HAD TO GO FIRST! Mek baru planning nak buat cara USA tu buat - leh curik2 dengar soalan. So I guess kata2 orang2 tua tu applies to all "Tu la, plan sangat nak buat jahat - kan dah kena kat diri sendiri!" And so mek terpaksa akur and jawab soalan itiew dulu.... :(

Question: Anda diberi masa 3 minit, you are live on Astro; to say whatever you wanna say, as the most popular tv personality! You are live, now! In 3 minutes! What would be you msg to thousands and millions of viewers.

• My answer: Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen, and welcome down to Miss World pageant 2004. Tonight I just would like to emphasis on who I really am, which is - I am cheeky, but honest. I am, temperamental, but forgiving. And most of, I'm ugly, but adorable! THANK YOU! (THANKS TO VW! That was a practiced Q waktu mek spent some time dengan VW reheasing Q and A session!!! Seronok gile bile dapat soalan tu and I get to answer cam tu! Terus mek confidensi melambung2 melampau2 utk menang - tetambah pulak, lepas dgr the rest of the answers from the other 4 finalists)


• Miss Thailand: (she said something about she's proud to represent her country in that pageant and she wants the world to know that drag queens, trannies and stuff - semuanye mampu membuat aktiviti sihat - tak semestinya sex jer... cam tu la lebey kurang - a good and safe answer I'd say! Memang superb sangat jawapan dia diblendkan dengan rupenye...)


• Miss Malaysia: Ermm.. Sayangi lah anak2 anda, sayangi lah keluarga anda, kerana, erm, begitu banyak sekali ya, sekarang ini, terdapat, kes penderaan kanak2 (MOTIF!?!?!?!!??!)


• Miss Kenya: I would like to stress out that there should be no more war; becoz of war, the children in the world are suffering, World Peace!!! (typical Miss World answer which I think was THE BEST answer!!!! GO KENYA! mek memang tak leh nak nafi kalau kalah dengan Kenya atau Thailand - BUT OBVIOUSLYLY NOT USA!!!!)


• Miss USA: Baiklah - semenjak kebelakangan ini, kes rogol makin menjadi2 di negara kita. Kita harus mengambil langkah dan (BLA BLA BLA ape tah - and she ended with) ingat - didikan ugama (SHE SAID UGAMA and not AGAMA! HAIYOH! From US!?) itu amatlah penting, dan satu lagik! Hantar lah anak2 anda ke sekolah2 mempertahankan diri - itu amat penting (despite a silly and stupid answer, I'd say she was TOO CASUAL during the last q/a and she was like, HELLO!?!?!? BLONDE BIMBO!?!?!?!? Except that she had black hair and not blonde la kan! DANG!!!!)

Owh this is getting TOO long - lets cut to the bottom line here. Thailand got 5th (sedeh kan? Mek so terkejut! Dan mek dah boleh agak dah sesuatuh tak sesssuuwaaaaiii akan berlaku), Malaysia got 4th place (pun mek tak sangka! With that answer, she should have got.. ermm.. yeah, got 4th place, and 5th patutnye USA!), 2nd Runner-up jatuh kepada KENYA (NYEH!!! MEK DAH TAHU SIAPA YANG NAK MENANG! DAN MEK TAK PUAS HATI!!!!) - and then me stepped ke depan dengan si USA genit tu! And bla bla bla (mek dah started tunjuk signs yang mek takkan menang to those yang cheering Dominican Republic patut menang) - and then BOOM! THE RESULT CAME OUT!



"First Runner-up, is Miss Dom. Rep. and the new Miss World 2004 is Miss USA!!!!!" Mek hampir2 pengsan (NOT DQ YER!!!!) tapi mek tahan, dan mek tahan jugak air mata itiew. Ramai kedengaran suara ketidakpuasan hati dari audience tu u ols! Tak percaya, VCD tu adalah bukti. VCDs tak propah la u ols! LOL! Apa apa pon, SO MUCH for maintaining victory, dua kali berturut2 kan? I guess malam tu I just had to akur dengan getting 1st runner-up, AGAIN (yerrr lah! Akur lah sangat! Dalam bilik ghengah nih nangis bagai nak rak. And surprisingly, Kak Vee pon nangis jugak - maybe dia sedeh tgk mek sedeh. Ke dia sedeh, penat2 dia make up, mek tak menang? Rugi jer make up! LOL! Tak lah! Mek rase Kak Vee tu pon turut terasa sedeh kot dan plus, she memang mudah tersentuh...) Dan yang penting, Abang Haidee and his wife masa masuk bilik mek turut menyatakan rasa ketidakpuasan hati mereka (sambil packing dress national costume mek dan my evening dress. Hehehehehe). Tapi, I won best evening dress what? Ehehehe - balik modal la kirenye - so mek ikut jer agreement mek ngan abang Haidee. Hadiah best evening dress dan best presentation on stage tu, mek split 50-50. Hadiah duit 1st runner-up pong mek split 50-50 (which memula mek tak tahu pun duit 1st runner-up tu pon mek kena split tapi dia ade cakap, apa apa yang mek menang malam tu, split. And its only fair lah kot sebab dia buat baju tu, tak der bayaran pa per. Tapi, dia cakap sponsor? Hmmm - pelikk pelik. Apa apa jer lah - mek tarkik!) So there you go; from a Walk To Remember as Miss Malaysia, to a road of yet another Failure! Mek sentap, tapi sehari dua jer. Lepas tu, ok dah ler. Ehehehehhe...

Next up: Episode 17: 1st half of 2004 Part 2(ii) - And followed by another failure, Queen of the Queens.


Nurlea Laurielle Lai Lee Abdullah
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